


if i could take us back, if i could just do that

by adrien_schlag



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV 2020)
Genre: Alex Mercer Has A Sibling (Julie and The Phantoms), M/M, honestly just a ton of willex fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-19 05:34:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29869932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adrien_schlag/pseuds/adrien_schlag
Summary: Alex goes back to visit his childhood home.Title from Unsaid Emily.
Relationships: Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), background Bobby | Trevor Wilson/Original Female Character
Comments: 7
Kudos: 80





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> ok so, for context, Alex has already visited his house once. he didn't go inside or anything, he just stood outside. 
> 
> this was inspired by [this](https://www.instagram.com/p/CLw7wfhA5UO/) picture!

"Hey, um, Willie?"

"What's up, hotdog?"

"I was thinking about visiting my old house again."

Willie looked up in surprise. "Oh?"

"Yeah. I never actually visited my room or anything like that, so I just wanted to go back and see..."

"You want me to come with?"

"Yeah... that would be great."

"You got it, dude. You wanna go now?"

Alex nodded and adjusted his fanny pack. 

"Alright. Lead the way, hotdog."

~

"Here we are."

As Alex took in the house, all the memories came flooding back. His little sister, Cassie, swinging on the swing set. Both kids giggling as they chase each other around the yard. Alex, staring up at his house for the last time. 

Willie gave Alex's hand a reassuring squeeze. "You sure you wanna go in?"

"Never been more sure of anything."

"You'll let me know if it gets too overwhelming?"

"Mm hmm." Alex started to walk up to the house, inhaling deeply. He gazed up at the pride flag billowing in the wind and sadly smiled, wishing his parents had been more accepting when he came out. 

He took a deep breath and stepped into the house, sensing Willie do the same. Not much had changed since 1995. There were still picture frames on the mantle, the ugly green wallpaper was still there, and the walls were still covered with drawings. 

Alex took a step closer to the fireplace, examining the pictures. Most of the pictures from his childhood were still there, but among the familiar pictures were unfamiliar ones. In one of the pictures, a blonde woman stood smiling at the camera, a toddler resting against her hip. A teenager stood next to them, and Alex knew the girl, he was sure of it. The picture looked recent, but Alex didn't think he'd ever seen it before. Then he recognized the woman. 

"Cassie?" he whispered, bringing a hand up to touch the frame.

"Is that your sister?"

Alex nodded soundlessly. His sister. All grown up. His sister, his baby sister, had a family. He was an uncle.

"That girl in the back looks really familiar," Willie noted, a small frown on his face as he tried to figure out where he'd seen the girl. 

Then Alex figured it out. "It's Carrie!" he gasped, inspecting the picture closer. 

"Like, as in Carrie Wilson? Your bandmate's daughter?"

"I-I think so, yeah. Carrie Wilson is my niece?"

"I mean, it would explain a lot about your connection."

"What connection?"

"Your dancing connection."

Alex was going to kill Luke and Reggie. Again. "They told you, didn't they?"

"Yep." Willie grinned and pressed a light kiss to Alex's cheek.

"Of course they did."

Alex continued to examine the unfamiliar pictures. It was mainly pictures of Cassie with her kids, but there was one picture that included his parents. They hadn't really changed that much. They looked older, sure. But they also looked happier. More relaxed. Alex felt a pang of sadness. His parents were probably happier now that they didn't have to deal with a gay kid 'tarnishing their reputation.'

"I think I'm gonna check my room now," Alex murmured, starting to walk towards the stairs when Willie let go. He wandered up the stairs and down the hallway to his room, and just stood outside his door. The sign he'd drawn in kindergarten was still taped to his door. The crooked letters spelling out his name gave Alex a sense of comfort.

"You don't have to go inside, Lex. We can always come back another time if you aren't ready."

"I know." Alex took a deep breath and slowly turned the knob, cringing when the door squeaked on its old hinges. When he stepped inside the room, the first thing he noticed was the small pride flag sitting on the bed. Ok, that definitely hadn't been there before. Overall, his room was the exact same as it was when he died. His planet stickers were still there, the David Bowie and ABBA posters were still in the exact place (although they were significantly more faded). His drum set was still in the corner, his pink record player still on top of his dresser.

"Wow. Your room is really nice," Willie remarked, and Alex felt a spark of pride. It had taken him weeks to get the glow-in-the-dark planets to stay in place, and every so often one would fall off the wall. But he loved his room. It was one of the only places he could truly be himself. 

Alex stepped further into the room and snatched the small pride flag from off the bed, then turned and grabbed his small bowl of push pins from the desk. He carefully pulled two push pins from the bowl and hung the small flag right above his record player. 

Perfect.

Alex turned and flopped down onto the bed, coughing when a cloud of dust surrounded him.

"You think those lights still work?" Willie asked, gesturing to the LED lights on the wall. 

"It's been 25 years, you tell me."

Willie smiled and wiggled his fingers at the lights. A few lights flickered on and off, and Willie frowned and wiggled his fingers again. This time, all the lights came on in a pink color, perfectly matching the color of Alex's shirt.

Alex propped himself up on his elbows and patted the bed in front of him. "Come sit, I promise it's comfier than it looks."

Willie grinned and laid down so his head was against Alex's chest, sighing in happiness. "You're right, this is really comfy."

"Don't tell my sister," Alex said, looking around as if his sister was actually listening, then dropped his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "I stole this blanket from her room."

Willie gasped. "You didn't."

"I did."

The skater giggled and picked up Alex's hand, lightly kissing the drummer's palm.

"Tell me about her."

"Hmm?"

"Your sister. Tell me about her."

"I... don't even know where to start. Cassie's a year younger than me... was? a year younger than me? I don't know how ghost time works, but when I was alive, she was a year younger than me. We were always close, and we did everything together. When Cassie wanted to sign up for dance classes, I begged my parents to sign me up too. When Cassie wanted to do gymnastics, I wanted to do gymnastics. Though, I didn't get very far with that. Turns out that I am not flexible whatsoever. Cassie wanted to try skateboarding? So did I. Which, never again. Anyway, she was the first person I told when I thought I was gay. She always supported me in everything, and I supported her."

"She sounds like an amazing sister."

"She is. Was? Is was the correct term? Honestly, why does English?"

"I ask myself the same thing every day." Willie sat up and threaded his hand behind Alex's head, then gently lifted the drummer's head and pressed a light kiss to his lips. 

"I love you, hotdog."

Alex's heart fluttered, and it was his turn to kiss Willie. 

"I love you too... speed bump."


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> part 2! i wasn't intending on making a second chapter, but people asked for it, so here it is!

The door to Alex's room slowly swung open, causing both Alex and Willie to jump apart when they heard the door creak. 

Cassie stood in the doorway, her arms tightly crossed across her stomach. Her brow furrowed when she saw the dip in the mattress, and she looked around the room in alarm. 

"Alex? Is... is that you?" Cassie whispered. 

Alex took a deep breath and made himself visible. "Hey, Cass."

Cassie yelped in surprise and stumbled back, clutching the doorway for support. "How- what- is it really you?"

"Yes, it's really me."

Cassie slowly walked forward and attempted to hug her brother, but ended up just falling forward onto the bed. Willie dove out of the way, and Cassie yelped again when the dip in the mattress moved.

"Alex, you better have a really good explanation for why the mattress just moved on its own."

Alex chuckled. "Ok, so. Well. After we died, we went to this weird dark room-"

"He cried," Willie interrupted with a grin on his face.

"She can't hear you, dork."

"Lexie, who's there?"

Willie reached out and took Alex's hand. "Hello."

Cassie squeaked in surprise. "Lexie, who's this?"

"This is my boyfriend, Willie."

"Boyfriend? Oh. OH-"

"Can I please get back to explaining?"

"Yeah, yeah, please continue."

"So we were in the dark room-"

"He cried, apparently," Willie interjected. 

"That does not surprise me in the slightest."

"Will you let me finish the story you goons?" Alex asked, an amused smile on his face.

"Ok, ok, fine. I promise I won't interrupt anymore."

"I'll hold you to that. Anyway, so we stayed in the dark room for 25 years, but it only felt like an hour. Then, suddenly, we were falling out of the sky into the studio. And there we met Julie, who's family moved into the house, and there was a lot of screaming, and Julie ran out. Then she returned with a cross, we found out we'd been in the room for 25 years, and that we were dead. We found out people could hear us play, and then we found out that we could be seen when we played with Julie, but we disappear when the song is over. Anyway, I was freaking out because we could be seen with people, and I went to take a walk, and this one ran me over." He jutted an accusatory finger in Willie's direction. 

"So anyway then we screamed in a museum together, found out that Bobby stole our songs, we went to haunt him, but we wanted to confront him, but we couldn't become visible to him."

Willie's face crumpled in guilt.

"Wills, it wasn't your fault," Alex said gently. "Anyway, we asked Willie if he could make us visible, but he couldn't."

"And I took them to my boss, Caleb-"

"Former boss."

The sides of Willie's mouth twitched up in a small smile. 

"Former boss," he amended. "Anyway, he... cursed them. And if they didn't join his house band, they would be flickered out of existence. Forever."

"So you joined his band," Cassie realized, her face confused. 

"Yes, we totally joined the band of the guy that tried to kill us. Again," Alex deadpanned. 

"Well you obviously weren't flickered out of existence, so excuse me for immediately thinking of the only other option you provided."

"So, we played the Orpheum, thinking we would cross over and be free from the jolts. But, it apparently wasn't our unfinished business, since we didn't cross over. After the show, Julie came into the studio, and Reggie gave us away. Luke, being the sap he is, made this whole speech about how 'no music is worth making, Julie, if we're not making it with you' and then we were all crying and Julie hugged Luke and he started glowing and suddenly they could touch, and then Reggie and I hugged Julie and then we started glowing and the stamps disappeared. And then I went to find Willie-"

"And when he found me, we were both emotional and then he finally kissed me and then I started glowing, and my stamp disappeared, oh, and there was a whole thing with Caleb possessing Reggie's boyfriend Nick, but that's a story for another time."

Cassie nodded slowly, looking stunned. "Okay, so, you came back as a ghost 25 years after your death, got cursed by an evil ghost, got to actually PLAY THE ORPHEUM, almost died for a second time, then pulled a Shrek when Julie hugged you."

"It's an over-simplification of events, but yes," Willie confirmed. 

"What's a Shrek?"

"Oh, it's a movie. I forgot you've missed out on twenty-five years worth of movies. Basically you started glowing because of love, and it saved you."

"Ah. Well yes, that's exactly what happened. Now, tell me what happened with you."

"Where to start?" Cassie gave a small laugh. "Ok, well, a few months after you died, Bobby and I started dating, because, I guess we bonded over your death? I don't know, to be honest. We got married in 2001, I had my daughter, Carrie, in 2004. Trevor and I got divorced later that year, after I found out that he stole your songs."

Alex nodded. "I know Carrie."

"You do?"

"Yeah, she's friends with Julie."

"YOU MEANT *THAT* JULIE? LIKE, JULIE MOLINA 'JULIE'?"

"That's the one."

"YOU'RE IN A BAND WITH JULIE MOLINA??"

"Yes, Cass."

"SHE'S PLAYING MUSIC AGAIN??"

"Oh my gosh, Cass, please stop yelling."

"OKAY!" After a pointed look from Alex, a guilty look came across her face and she muttered. "Okay. Anyway, my youngest, Connor, I adopted earlier this year."

"Really sticking with the 'C' theme, huh?" Alex asked, a smile on us face.

Cassie grinned in response.

"Did Mom and Dad—did they really change?"

Cassie's eyes started to fill with tears, and she sadly smiled. "Yeah. They did. They were already starting to be more accepting before you died, but they didn't know where you were. None of us did. And then..."

"I died."

"Yeah. They miss you Alex, they really do."

"So they haven't..."

"Died? Nope. I think they're determined to make sure you know how much they care about you, and how they would change how they acted in a heartbeat if they could."

A car door slammed outside, followed by the sounds of the front door swinging open. 

"They must be back from shopping. Do you... wanna see them?"

Alex shook his head. He wasn't ready, not yet. "I'll see them soon."

"Alright." Cassie reached for a pen and a sticky note, and scribbled something Alex couldn't read. When Cassie handed the paper to him, he saw that it was an address. 

"That's my house. Come stop by soon, yeah?"

"Of course."

"Cassandra, is that you? Who are you talking to?" A voice called up the stairs.

"I'm just talking to Marlee!"

"From church?"

"Yep!"

"Okay. You know, she's a lovely young lady..."

"Mom!" Cassie exclaimed, though her pale cheeks were tinted pink.

"Okay, okay. Dinner will be ready in about half an hour."

"Alright!" Cassie turned back to Alex, reaching forward to give him a hug, but caught herself and retracted her hands. "See you later, Lexie. Oh, and if you see Carrie soon, give her a hug for me. If you can."

"Will do. Bye Cass."

"Bye." Cassie walked towards the door, turned and smiled at Alex, then walked out of the room, closing the door softly behind her.

Alex made himself invisible again, a silent tear slipping down his face. Willie put his arms around his boyfriend and Alex leaned into the touch, resting his forehead against Willie's shoulder.

"You alright, hotdog?"

Alex nodded. "Can we go see Carrie?"

"You sure?"

"Uh-huh."

"Alright."

~~

"Hey Lex. Hey Willie."

"Hey Care."

"What's up?"

Alex fidgeted with his fanny pack for a split second before blurting, "You're my niece!"

"Yeah... I know," Carrie said slowly. 

"You do?"

"Yeah, Mom's showed me pictures of you."

"Oh."

"Yep. Is... that it?"

"Oh, um, your mom told me to give you a hug, but... I can't do that. So... air hug?" Alex extended his arms. 

"Air hug," Carrie agreed, laughing as she returned the air-embrace. 

"Ok, I gotta get back to the studio for band practice. See you later?"

"See you later, Lex."

"Bye Carrie."

**Author's Note:**

> aaaa this was so fun to write 🥺 please leave kudos and comments, they make my day


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